Words to Live By
Lesson One:
“You don’t have a briefcase if you don’t like your job.”
Lesson Two:
“Jesus was a loud-mouthed super hero.”
Lesson Three:
“The longer they sit, the harder they stand. But! The longer they sit, the easier they lay down and go to sleep.”
This has been another glorious episode of…
Words to Live By
Until next time, kids!
This blog was created to relay valuable life advice based on first hand experiences…and stuff.
Welcome, kids!
This is Feminine Wiles with DJ Dk!
Brought to you in part by:
Marijuana
And
A General Need to Cause Trouble
On our first episode, DJ Dk (and special guest MJ Sparkles) will explain the dos and don’ts of International Traveling.
How Not to Get Arrested in Germany
Step 1:
Do NOT bring drugs into Germany. If you bring drugs into Germany, see step 5. If not, see step 2.
Step 2:
Congratulations! You have now not been arrested in Germany! Carry on to Step 3.
Step 3:
Shit, there’s no pot in Germany!
Step 4:
Oh well.
Step 5:
DO NOT BRING DRUGS INTO GERMANY!!!!!
Perhaps I should give a bit of background to this post. I think the picture is fairly obvious. There was weed, disarmingly cute drug dogs, and a police force that enjoyed their time “fucking” with the Americans.
Take my advice, kids. If you want to enjoy your stay in Germany, leave the drugs at home. I promise, when you come back there will be more than you can stand of old Mary-Jane.
Until Next Time…
This is DJ Dk
Signing off.
And now…
Words to Live By.
Hello, and welcome to Words To Live By. I’m your host, DJ Dk, and each installment I shall convey valuable life facts and lessons to make your time on this planet a little smoother.
Our first lesson:
“If it takes more than two fingers, ask for help.”
Until next time! This has been…
Words To Live By.
During my semester in Holland, I decided it would be a good idea to document all the interesting life lessons I am educated in. See, Holland is a strange place. There is a reason it is the second happiest country on earth. There is no reason why Iceland is the happiest country on earth.
You see, in Holland, they measure your speed based on a smiley or frowny face. This, right here, should give a clue as to how opposite Europe is from America.
The following entries will most likely only consist of various notes on how to survive in this strange land. I will leave it to you to piece together how they translate to my journey…and real life.
